And things could be worse. The camp has schools and wells, which serve an impressive number of residents. In the past month, despite the heat, only seven huts' thatched roofs burned down. In some sections, the huts are very nicely spread-out. The past rainy seasons have formed ditches which I imagine will provide reasonable drainage once the rains start. NGO-sponsored buildings and sustainable, income-generating activities can be seen everywhere.
I again recognize my internal feeling of acceptance. Something inside me just switches off. Yes, this camp is probably better-off than most, and at first glance it may seem okay. But... look closer. Most residents probably depend exclusively on World Food Programme for food (maize, beans, and cooking oil: barely enough to stay alive). I saw a puddle in one of the ditches, which seems like a perfect breeding spot for malaria-carrying mosquitoes (and I'm sure few if any residents have mosquito nets or can afford drugs). Children have tattered clothing or stay naked.
As I have experienced before when I'm around anybody who is knowledgeable, I choose my questions carefully: I expose myself to however much hope or despair I feel I can absorb. For instance, today I wanted to know how many people live in each hut and whether the huts are a fire hazard; but I didn't really want to know the malaria or HIV rates. I'll find those out some other day, or maybe I'll forget to ask before I leave. Today, when I saw that stagnant puddle, I consciously ignored it.
One has to be careful when asking questions, too. If you ask people personal questions, you may get more than you bargained for. More importantly, though, you may make your host relive traumatic experiences. It's a faux-pas. And (not that I personally have made this mistake) nobody tells you this sort of thing: you have to discover it for yourself. Hopefully you come up with it through abstract reasoning, rather than through an actual mistake.
In my switched-off state, I look at the peace and tranquility around me. I see the selfless help of the indispensible NGOs. I watch residents cope with life without complaint, getting along perfectly. And, quite abstracted from reality, I think to myself, yet again:
You can learn and absorb as little or as much information as you want. You have the tools to create within yourself a sense of pure hope or a sense of complete despair: a need to help everybody, a need to help a select few, or a need to leave everybody alone. You choose to see what you need to see to arrive at whatever conclusions you desire. You decide your level of involvement.
Fun Fact: As of 2005, according to the United Nations, at least 85% of girls who arrived at the Gulu trauma center for former LRA abductees contracted sexually transmitted diseases during their captivity.